The Hip Priests
Full Tilt Bullshit
No Balls Records/Ghost Highway Records

The rock n’ roll manifesto as translated by The Hip Priests is clearly defined by Full Tilt Bullshit‘s opening saliva-covered salvo: “Sonic Reproducer”. Pretty simple, really. While they may not necessarily be young, they are awfully loud and exceptionally snotty, and it’s been years since the UK band last jammed up my radar with their super lubed hot rock action. The frothy fun of 2006′s Number of the Priests EP and 2007′s full-length Tight ‘N’ Exciting had all but fizzled out in my mind when I caught wind of a 2011 split with Electric Frankenstein, and just like that the boys were back. It was like the ghosts of Stiv Bators and Fred “Sonic” Smith were smiling down on me, and now there’s even a new full-length album of garage punk madness to get all revved up about. Bruising bastards born to lose and booze, The Hip Priests busted out of the demise of The Divine Brown and the X-Rays with a mission to mash the spit-saw energy of bands like The Stooges, Dead Boys, The Dictators, Gluecifer, Turbonegro, and The Hellacopters into a greasy gush of over-sexed, electric awesomeness. Despite the time that’s passed, and the fact that during the album’s recording the band split with their singer and the studio lost the entire album (the band obviously got themselves a new singer and re-recorded the whole damn thing), The Hip Priests are still a fully functional rock n’ roll hard-on that has come to fuck and get fucked up, and Full Tilt Bullshit charges its way through a singular vision of masturbation (“Wrist Action”), ejaculation (“DNA Dynamo”), provocation (“Loud ‘n’ Lewd”), and titillation (“Outta My Head [Into Your Pants]“) like a bull in a knickers shop. Only for the cheap n’ loose among us, this one.

Check out the video for “Sonic Reproducer” from Full Tilt Bullshit!

I prefer to review albums the year they are released in order not to appear dated, but sometimes albums find their way to me the following calendar year. I respect the effort (and, in some cases, money) bands put into sending me their music for review, so the least I can do is give them some blog time. Here’s a quick run through some music that was released in 2011, because it’s never too late…  

Iron Lamb
The Original Sin
Pulverised

Were I at all timely with this review, The Original Sin, the debut album from Sweden’s Iron Lamb, would have been a certified year-ender on account of its steely black glory. Like Entombed meets Turbonegro, Iron Lamb is a high flying death machine — part death n’ roll, part deathpunk, but all elbow swings and neck snaps. Hell, even its mob vocal action will choke you senseless. Despite the fact that its 10 rotten songs are over before your sweat hits the floor, The Original Sin is miles of razor wire better than most of the other metal albums I heard last year. Oh, and bonus points for a cover of Motörhead’s “Poison” and intro’ing “I Don’t Like You” with a sound clip from The Warriors. Not that it needed bonus points at all, though.

Listen to “Suicide” from The Original Sin!

CJ Sleez
Valley of the Shadow
Sleez Records

She’s still wearing corsets and fishnets, and everything’s still covered in pink, but on Valley of the Shadow, Hamilton’s sleaze queen, CJ Sleez, must have replaced her eye-lined backing band from 2006′s Back From the Brink EP with a backing band in bullet belts, because with the exception of gutter punk opener “Back to Nowhere,” this album’s nothin’ but hollow old school thrash punctuated by trashcan riffs and alley cat screams. I never saw this change in musical direction coming from Sleez, but I guess even girls in lipstick and stripper heels need to windmill every once in awhile.

Listen to “In The Flesh” from Valley of the Shadow!

Venomous Maximus
The Mission
Cutthroat Records

Houston quartet Venomous Maximus is a dirty, proto-sleaze, biker metal gang who barbecues the hell out of some Sabbathian doom and seasons it with some Sword riffage for maximum flavour. I’m pretty confident that Venomous Maximus will be able to fill the void left in my life by the demise of Canadian skull kickers Damn 13 (vocalist Gregg Higgins’ brimstone howl is eerily similar to that of Damn 13′s Adam Sewell), which means I can cry happy black tears once again. The Mission is a four-song EP (four if you have the vinyl; the CD has a couple of bonus tracks), but a full-length is expected this year, so I’m stockpiling the booze, bullets, and lighter fluid in anticipation of its arrival.

Listen to “The Gift” from The Mission!

Throw the Goat
Demo Primero
Regurgitation Records

I really hate it when someone throws the goat incorrectly. It should be palm out. People can’t ever seem to remember that. However, given their maniacal musical tendencies, I gotta believe that this Idyllwild, California band of horned rubber mask miscreants excel at throwing the goat, be it at old ladies at the bus stop or at the dude behind the counter at the porno shop. Then when they’re done terrorizing pedestrians with Satanic hand gestures they head back to their rented storage space, freak out on some desert punk rawk, have sword fights with rusty tailpipes, and throw the goat at one another. Palms out, of course.

Listen to “Excuses” from Demo Primero!

Into the Storm
Captains
Alive & Breathing Records

Of the five songs on Into the Storm’s second release, Captains, four of them contain dedicated titles, including “Bodhi Zephyr,” “Jean-Luc Picard,” “John Jameson,” and “Walter White.” What does this mean? I don’t know, that they like whiskey and television? Surfing and comics? I know one of them is a captain. Listen, I’m having a hard enough time deciphering the Seattle band’s experimental metal, which is currently beating me about the head and ears like an angry gorilla, to even fathom the lyrical content. Anyway, if you go all in for hardcore torture, Captains is for you. It’s especially for you if you also collect vinyl for the art of it, seeing as how this 12″ comes with seven pieces of original artwork by the band.

Stream Captains here and pay what you want for a download!

Grails
Deep Politics
Temporary Residence Limited

On Deep Politics, Grails’ oft-meditative instrumentation is dressed with an orchestral, cinematic ruching thanks in large part to the efforts of fiddler and composer Timba Harris (Master Musicians of Bukkake). Harris’ involvement on this album helps the Portland quartet wrap their avant-garde post-rock in celluloid and story-telling, and the overall effect is a dynamic soundtrack to curtains blowing in an empty room, cigarette smoke swirling under a lamp post on a rainy night, an empty bottle of desire hitting the floor after a passionate fight, or the bone-chilling glint of a slashing knife. This intricate score of crescendo noir works as both silent beauty and heavy terror, bandying about effluent sci-fi (“Future Primitive”), Italian craftsmanship (Bruno Nicolai’s “All the Colors of the Dark”), blushing romanticism (“Deep Politics”), prog-infused action (“Almost Grew My Hair”), and high-noon drama (“I Led Three Lives”) effortlessly, seamlessly, and extravagantly. Deep Politics doesn’t quite contain the mean zen of albums past, but it’s a creatively rich and enjoyable experience nonetheless. And remember, Grails nuts, the attraction that is Black Tar Prophecies Vol. 5 is supposed to be coming soon.

Listen to “Daughters of Bilitis” from Deep Politics!