“Let’s get this one.”
“But Val Kilmer is in it.”
“Come on, Val Kilmer does great work. I mean, not recently, but he has…twice.”

That’s how the wife and I ended up grabbing The Thaw. But it wasn’t just Val Kilmer’s billing that sold us, it was also because The Thaw is about researchers who discover – and become infected by – deadly parasites feeding on a woolly mammoth carcass in the Canadian arctic. We LIVE in the Canadian arctic (or damn close, anyway) so we felt watching The Thaw could one day prepare us for when the ice actually melts and unleashes tiny prehistoric killers that will do their best to feast on our flesh. For instance, we discovered that cutting off your arm at the elbow because you’ve been bitten near the wrist will not, in fact, save the rest of your arm…or you. That’s important information.

Bugs, it seems, are a bitch to quarantine. That’s another one. Oh, and if we do ever find ourselves in such a dilemma, we’re gonna hope we’re not isolated with a bunch of ecology students. You know that once the kids show up, it’s all bickering and crying from that point on. Then one of them will act all tough and grab a gun and try to control the situation. One of them will likely lie to you about being infected, too. Those bastards.

Anyway, The Thaw has this whole global warming message attached to it, so be responsible or else. It also stars Martha MacIssac (Superbad) and aside from the usual prats and pitfalls of your standard infectious horror flick, it will make you squirm and itch.

And in case you’re wondering, those two times were The Salton Sea and Heat. Nope, not even The Doors. Top Gun, maybe…but not The Doors.

Check out the trailer for The Thaw!