Trap Them
Darker Handcraft
Prosthetic Records

Here’s what’s different about Trap Them’s latest full-length album, Darker Handcraft: it features new full-time drummer Chris Maggio (ex-Coliseum), it has been released on new label Prosthetic Records (after a few years/releases with Deathwish Inc. and one EP with Southern Lord), and its songs are no longer labeled as numbered days. Now, here’s what’s not different about Darker Handcraft: it has, once again, been manhandled by Converge guitarist and super-producer Kurt Ballou, and it contains, once again, an unbelievably potent and possessive force of extreme metal/(grind-, crust-, hard-)core. Basically, it steals all the prefixes, obliterates ‘em, and scatters the gruesome dust over your pummeled being, a disastrous funeral of sorts with a corpse-raping wake that dissolves into some not-so-silent moments of silence with “Drag the Wounds Eternal” and “Scars Align” (examples of Trap Them releasing, albeit ever-so-slightly, their soul-crunching grip). Ultimately, what’s not different about Darker Handcraft is its 30 plus minutes of distorted brilliance, callous cunning, and barking mad, totalitarian rule. Like Trap Them’s previous efforts, this is just another impressive link in the heavy chain dragging us along the left hand path to where the scum and filth will one day worship these American masters.

Listen to “Slumcult & Gather” from Darker Handcraft!

Red Giant
Dysfunctional Majesty
Small Stone

Red Giant have always been somewhat of an enigma. They disappear for years at a time and just when you think you’ve forgotten all about ‘em, they show up at your door one day, ten stories tall, clutching a sledgehammer in one hand and a cluster of planets in the other hand, a shit-eating grin like a chasm on their face. Then all of a sudden it’s like they never went anywhere at all, and the reason they’ve only put out two albums in the last eleven years (1999′s Ultra-Magnetic Glowing Sound and 2004′s Devil Child Blues) is because they’re thick-chested overlords of the cosmic mean machine with some heavy duty responsibilities, like riding high atop choppers of flame into the heart of interstellar battle, forging lunar wars in the name of universal dominion. Only when they’ve defeated their space foes and captured the black skies above us do they settle down to tell tales of their conquests via macho, bubbling, dope n’ roll songs. Their latest episode, Dysfunctional Majesty, is another batch of bad-ass biker metal blues cut from blood-soaked denim and bathroom walls, which means it sounds like AC/DC, Alabama Thunderpussy, Beggar’s Ball, Dixie Witch, and any one of Wino’s bands all at once, in case you’re having trouble remembering. However, dig the Clutch-like groove on “These Satisfactions are Permanent” and the Sleep-like doom of “Silver Shirley” for some new twists on their gruesome, galactic sound. Hop on board this one, friends, because it’s one hell of an awesome ride and who knows when they’ll be back around for another spin.

Listen to “Chopper” from Dysfunctional Majesty!

Buy Dysfunctional Majesty from Small Stone!

Bradley Cooper’s been a busy man the last few years. His profile is getting somewhat larger thanks to roles in such movies as New York, I Love You, He’s Just Not That Into You, All About Steve, Valentine’s Day, The A-Team, and everyone’s favourite boozy farce, The Hangover. However, just mere seconds before becoming one of those ‘it’ people housewives love so much, he starred in 2008′s The Midnight Meat Train, which, as you can already imagine, isn’t exactly a romantic comedy. In fact, The Midnight Meat Train is another Clive Barker adaptation taken from his collection of short stories, Books of Blood: Volume I. The film also stars British mute and all-around tough guy, Vinnie Jones, who, true to form, only says one word the entire movie. Anyway, The Midnight Meat Train is a lot better than Dread, another Barker adaptation we recently looked at, a wicked splatter flick that offers over-the-top scenes of gruesome violence and enough computer generated blood to fill an entire subway car. Which is exactly what happens, actually.

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