Midnight
Satanic Royalty
Hells Headbangers

After almost ten years of releasing only splits and EPs — and not really wanting to become a real band at all –  Cleveland’s cult metal band Midnight have finally succumbed to a full-length job, and it’s the genuine article, man. Led by Athenar, the same freak responsible for the brew-fueled madness that was Boulder, Midnight don executioner hoods, worship flame and steel, and rip through ten songs (eleven if you have the vinyl) of black metal thrash so absurdly good you’ll be reawakening neck muscles that have been retired since the early 80s. It’s clear that Midnight’s mission is annihilation, which they deliver to you, like a shitty 2 AM pizza, in thirty minutes or less, and despite the fact that Satanic Royalty is dripping with Venom inspired evil violence, its really powered by a degenerate biker rawk Athenar has no doubt borrowed from his Boulder days. Thus, every song, especially “You Can’t Stop Steel,” “Lust, Filth and Sleaze,” and “Shock ’til Blood,” sound like Cronos leading Motörhead on a black-winged ride outta hell and straight up your ass. Anyone who has stuck by Midnight over the years waiting for this day to come can go ahead and raise their gauntlets high. As for the uninitiated, prepare to be outright dominated by pure metal riff-itude.

Listen to “Lust, Filth and Sleaze” from Satanic Royalty!

I’m giving this month’s BOM honour to C’mon’s Ian Blurton. I’ve consistently put Sir Ian’s beard on a pedestal, and the fact that his band just released a new 10″ gives me occasion to do it once again. Ian’s beard is accentuated perfectly by a sweat-stained ball cap, denim jacket, baggy eyes, and fuzzy rawk riffs, and dutifully he rarely goes anywhere without ‘em. Now, I must admit, I’m also giving Sir Ian the nod this month because I recently read a scathing critique of Ian here, and although said in mocking tone, the author suggested Ian shave his beard. I don’t like reading that, even in jest. So, I’ve got your back, Ian! At least as much as this stands for anything.

I also want to applaud Ancestors and Night Horse guitarist Justin Maranga, who always keeps it burly. While Justin’s wicked wool always seems to vary in length, it’s never less than prominent and powerful. There are two things I can tell you about Justin that I know for sure: he knows how to rock and he knows how to beard.

C’mon
The Mountain
Yeah Right! Records

The Mountain, the new four-song 10″ from C’mon, Canada’s premiere bleary-eyed bastards of fuzz, kicks off with the longest, most ambitious song the band has ever laid down. Until now, the seven-minute track “Fortress of the Night” from 2010′s Beyond the Pale Horse held that distinction, but this here title track, which commands all of side A, clocks in just shy of 12 minutes, and reaches an epic and dangerous precipice the band had only previously admired from afar. C’mon has built an outstanding reputation as a band that can move a mountain by sheer rawk force alone, but this time they do us one better and scale the entire fucking thing in a burnt-out van, blowing dirty exhaust the entire way, planting their tattered flag at the top when they land. What they unleash on the world below is a spacey rumble of arena bravado and prog-crunch, a steady build-up of monolithic metal like a giant analog amp rising up from behind the fires of the sun. Musically, “The Mountain” is more dense and layered than anything C’mon has done in the past* and that kind of studio presence/trickery continues as the band bounds on down the back side in its usual muddy-riffed fashion, turning thrusters on high and heavy with “It’s Alright,” the wonky instrumental “The Grunge,” and a cover of The Osmonds’ “Crazy Horses,” a pretty weird beard song to begin with that is given a special kind of supercharged Blurtonian treatment here. Okay, I know you’re waiting for me to say it, so here it is: C’mon does it again.

*Singer/guitarist Ian Blurton has said in an interview that at one point in the song there are two versions of the band playing against each other, so two drum kits, two basses, and about 25 guitars, which he called a tribute to Voivod’s Piggy and Thin Lizzy’s Gary Moore.

Listen to “The Grudge” from The Mountain!